I never really thought this would happen to me. I wanted to have myself, my life and my relationship thoroughly figured out beforehand. I wanted everything to be perfect before bringing anyone into the world. Maybe I just wanted to stall until I was menopausal...I'm not sure, but this certainly did not fit into my plans.
And now despite all of my plans, there will be a kid in this world that is half kemper and half me, and I am miraculously unprepared. 24 and pregant. 25 and a mom. I'm sure I will relax. I'm sure this will get better and worse and better again.
For now, I am horribly sick, almost every minute of the day. Apparently the words "morning sickness" are an absolute lie. I think most bits of pregnancy "facts" are lies to convince us to reproduce. And all of these lies are facilitated by my mother and my sister....I swear I've never seen anyone more excited than these two...I mean I'm an unwed pregnant person for god's sake. According to my family you'd think I was pregnant with the messiah.
But overall I am excited. It's a crazy thing that I have no control of, but I do have the important things to raise a good person. I am madly in love with the father of this kid...I think that was my main concern always....especially considering my mother's history. I'm smart, I have a mad researcher of all things for a best friend, my family is obsessed with this kid (maybe good and bad), we do have a house, and I (after what feels like a billion years) have an actual plan for my life. So maybe I'm more prepared than I think.
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